It’s time for my weekly 2A feverdream, Saturday shoot-around. You will have to forgive the fact I’ve been starting these pieces with a bit of poetry, but it’s my fever dream, y’all just get to go along for the ride. This week’s piece is one of the Barrack-room Ballads from Rudyard Kipling.
I went into a public ‘ouse to get a pint o’ beer, The publican ‘e up an’ sez, ” We serve no red-coats here.” The girls be’ind the bar they laughed an’ giggled fit to die, I outs into the street again an’ to myself sez I: O it’s Tommy this, an’ Tommy that, an’ ” Tommy, go away ” ; But it’s ” Thank you, Mister Atkins,” when the band begins to play The band begins to play, my boys, the band begins to play, O it’s ” Thank you, Mister Atkins,” when the band begins to play.
I went into a theatre as sober as could be, They gave a drunk civilian room, but ‘adn’t none for me; They sent me to the gallery or round the music-‘alls, But when it comes to fightin’, Lord! they’ll shove me in the stalls! For it’s Tommy this, an’ Tommy that, an’ ” Tommy, wait outside “; But it’s ” Special train for Atkins ” when the trooper’s on the tide The troopship’s on the tide, my boys, the troopship’s on the tide, O it’s ” Special train for Atkins ” when the trooper’s on the tide.
Yes, makin’ mock o’ uniforms that guard you while you sleep Is cheaper than them uniforms, an’ they’re starvation cheap. An’ hustlin’ drunken soldiers when they’re goin’ large a bit Is five times better business than paradin’ in full kit. Then it’s Tommy this, an’ Tommy that, an` Tommy, ‘ow’s yer soul? ” But it’s ” Thin red line of ‘eroes ” when the drums begin to roll The drums begin to roll, my boys, the drums begin to roll, O it’s ” Thin red line of ‘eroes, ” when the drums begin to roll.
We aren’t no thin red ‘eroes, nor we aren’t no blackguards too, But single men in barricks, most remarkable like you; An’ if sometimes our conduck isn’t all your fancy paints, Why, single men in barricks don’t grow into plaster saints; While it’s Tommy this, an’ Tommy that, an` Tommy, fall be’ind,” But it’s ” Please to walk in front, sir,” when there’s trouble in the wind There’s trouble in the wind, my boys, there’s trouble in the wind, O it’s ” Please to walk in front, sir,” when there’s trouble in the wind.
You talk o’ better food for us, an’ schools, an’ fires, an’ all: We’ll wait for extry rations if you treat us rational. Don’t mess about the cook-room slops, but prove it to our face The Widow’s Uniform is not the soldier-man’s disgrace. For it’s Tommy this, an’ Tommy that, an` Chuck him out, the brute! ” But it’s ” Saviour of ‘is country ” when the guns begin to shoot; An’ it’s Tommy this, an’ Tommy that, an’ anything you please; An ‘Tommy ain’t a bloomin’ fool – you bet that Tommy sees!
Tommy by Rudyard Kipling
A federal judge in Colorado just said the 2nd Amendment does not extend to acquiring firearms. U.S. District Judge John L. Kane, an 86-year-old appointee of Jimmy Carter back in 1977, made the eyebrow-raising decision in a case known as Rocky Mountain Gun Owners v. Polis, which challenges Colorado’s newly-enacted three-day waiting period on all gun sales. Kane denied the group’s request for an injunction that would have halted enforcement of the waiting period while the litigation continues, ruling the plain text of the Second Amendment only covers the right to keep and bear a firearm, not to purchase or acquire one for lawful purposes.
In somewhat better 2A news, SCOTUS had conference discussions on Range v Garland. For those unfamiliar with this case (being honest, this editor only had a passing acquaintance with it before this writing) Brian Range was convicted of a single count of misdemeanor filing a false official statement charge in Pennsylvania. Because the charge carried a potential sentence of more than a year, he became a prohibited person. The Third Circuit overturned a lower court ruling that he was an “unvirtuous citizen” whose crime, while nonviolent, was considered a felony in many jurisdictions. That alone was sufficient for the government to permanently disarm him. The en-banc 3rd Circuit ruling sets up a judicial split as other circuits have held the opposite. I’ll revisit this story when more news breaks.
I am not a big wingshooter, nor do I hunt waterfowl all that much, but for those who do Hevi-shot has introduced a new .410 waterfowl load. The new load options are 1/2-ounce, 3-inch, in shot size No. 5 or 7, with an advertised muzzle velocity of 1,250 fps. HEVI-XII is the original 12-g/cc density, tungsten alloy recipe from HEVI-Shot. These new products are now shipping to dealers and are available. My wingshooting is terrible, so I don’t see the need to handicap myself. I’ll stick to my 12ga for ducks and geese thanks.
It’s not often that this editor comes across a gun lubricant that works as well as the stuff he ‘makes’ himself. Then he ran into Lucas Oil’s Extreme Duty gun oil and grease. This stuff just works. And it isn’t priced badly at around $8 for a 1oz precision applicator bottle.
If you’re curious as to what I make and use, it’s a pretty simple recipe. All you need is a quart of synthetic ATF, a pint of Marvel mystery oil and a container large enough to mix them in. Transfer the mix into smaller bottles and use generously.
Now for a bit of Gun Porn. But before we get to the actual gun, a little backstory is in order. In your editor’s youth he read a book. Not just any book, but Death in the Long Grass by Peter Hathaway Capstick. (As an aside, it seems that Capstick has been somewhat discredited of late. There are accusations that he copped many of his stories from others and was in fact a bartender and not a PH. Whether or not any of that is true, the man could spin a yarn.) It started a love affair with safari-type guns that has lasted to this day. Today’s gun porn is a Wm. Evans double rifle in .470 nitro express. I’d sell my first-born for one of these rifles.
This particular box-lock double rifle was made in 1919 and sold for a bit more than $20,000 a while back. I’ve seen other examples of vintage Evans double rifles go for three times that much money.
